The past few days have been a whirlwind. I’ve been running from work to college finals and back to work again. There are a couple of stories worth mentioning though.
The first took place three days ago when I was asked what kind of breakfast sandwiches we had. The openers had forgotten to put out the sign listing the various morning delicacies, so I slid it in and began explaining which sandwiches were which (let’s suppose the man’s name is Brad).
Me: “Well, sir, we have bacon and ham artisan rolls, spinach feta wraps, and piadinis. The only thing we’re out of is the reduced fat turkey bacon.”
Brad: “Eh?”
Me: “The reduced fat turkey bacon…it’s the only thing we don’t have.”
Brad: “Soooo, what about this turkey bacon? Do you have that?”
It’s very hard to hold back a face sometimes, but I’ve gotten pretty good at it over the past 18 months. Another such notable exchange took place on Thursday night, five minutes before I scurried away to the last in-class final of my collegiate life.
I was on bar and was called an iced solo macchiato (espresso macchiatos are very different from caramel macchiatos…they are made with just espresso and foam). When the woman who ordered it walked up to the bar, I asked her if she just wanted espresso and milk since it was iced, or if she wanted some foam on top of the ice (something that, in my opinion, makes for a very excellent contrast). However, instead of answering my question, the woman (let’s name her Danielle) picked up a venti caramel frappuccino and asked if it was her macchiato.
Me: “No, I’m sorry…that’s a caramel frappuccino. A macchiato is espresso with foam.”
*Danielle picks up the frappuccino again*
D: “This is my macchiato?”
Me: “No, maam. A macchiato is espresso with foam. That is a caramel frappuccino. That drink is like a smoothie…it’s blended with ice.”
*Danielle looks very perplexed*
D: “Oh…so this isn’t my macchiato?”
Me: “No. Did you want a frappuccino?”
D: “Uh…I guess. Sure, I’ll try one of those.”
Two final things: one is a future plan for the next few entries into this blog, the other is a quote from my fiance.
I am planning on writing some insight into the world of Starbucks after realizing just how clueless about it I was before I began working there. I hadn’t the faintest notion of what a cafe mocha was, was clueless as to how to tell the difference between a cappuccino and a latte, and certainly didn’t know it was possible to order the thirteen word drink “Iced Half-Caff Triple Grande Five Pump Cinnamon Dolce Breve With Whip Red Eye. Thus, I will explain a few things in the language of the people…a “Starbucks Simplified” handbook, if you will.
As for the quote, it came after sending a picture or two of myself drinking my morning chottie.
“I’d like my coffee with an extra shot of frantic love, please.”
Go ahead and poke fun at us, but even our love is coffee infused 🙂
the many minute musings of a barista 
Awww you two and your coffee-infused love-life. ❤
someone called you an iced solo macchiato. to borrow from a contemporary classic, “aw, and you can’t get them to stop?” i won’t ever call you that. promise. it’s too many words.
ps: very good idea, giving us insider starbucks lingo tips. i’m already exciting about it.
This entry is brilliance.
People need their hands held with all those polysyllabic foreign drink names. As long as they don’t bite my head off in the process, I’m glad to do it. And you seem to be too. God bless you. 🙂